Category: Relationships

Healing your Relationship

Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009 by Dr Mia

Sex can be many things in a good relationship… spontaneous, passionate, soothing, reassuring, healing, fun… but above all, loving. It is impossible, however, to have a healthy, happy sex life if you have unfinished business from the past in your relationship with your partner. You owe it to yourself to take a good hard look at old hurts and buried anger. We often choose intimate partners because of early life experiences that are begging for closure in the present.

In order to restore your sexual energy and rekindle passion, both your and your partner must be willing to ask – and listen to the answers to – some difficult questions about your relationship. Speak up about what you won’t tolerate anymore. Refrain from blaming your partner when you raise issues. If you do it with an open heart, you invite healing in.

If you’re feeling stuck and don’t know where to start, get help from a counsellor, psychologist or sex therapist. A good place to start is to set goals so that you have clarity about what you would like your relationship to be like. If you don’t know where you’re heading, you keep going around in circles.

Relationship Action Steps

1. Redefine and update your relationship. Make a list of the issues in your relationship that haven’t been resolved and attend to it.

2. Hold a candle ceremony. Light a candle, imagine a negative feeling that you have about your relationship or your partner, and then feed that emotion to the flame. As you do so, envisage the emotion being consumed by the flame and celebrate the release of that emotion.


3. Actively practice forgiveness. Forgive yourself and your partner for perceived wrong-doings of the past.

4. Meditate on who you would like to be as a partner and be honest about what you have to change within yourself - then do it. All it takes is courage and determination.

5. Make a conscious decision to boost romance. Flowers, cards, and romantic nights out are all part of what keeps romance thriving. Make your bedroom more sensual with scented candles. Play romantic music. Massage each other with aromatic oils.

6. Be playful with your partner. Explore ways to add creativity and freshness to your love-making. Try different sex toys and positions. Laugh. In short, have more fun!

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12 Superhot Romance Ideas to Add Sizzle to Your Relationship

Sunday, May 31st, 2009 by Dr Mia

If you wish to take your sex life to the next level, all you may be missing is a touch of romance. Keep in mind though, that men and women view romance differently. Unlike women, men are not impressed with roses, teddy bears or balloons. If you want to romance your man, he may be impressed if you supply him with a fridge full of beer and meat sandwiches! If you wish to impress your woman you would be best to surprise her with a candle light dinner or little love notes that you leave for her to find. You can deliver incredible pleasure to your lover, while still catering to their needs. Your challenge is to find the perfect way to say, “I love you” to your partner.

Superhot Romance Ideas:

1. Purchase a blank card, and a small bottle of massage oil. Wrap the oil up in gift-wrap, and write this message on the card: ‘If you desire a massage, call (your phone number) for your appointment.’ Then sit back and wait for your lover to phone you up.

2. If you do not traditionally sleep naked, shake things up by slipping under the covers nude, and take some time to spoon your lover.

3. Set up a sexy photo shoot with a professional photographer that includes both you and your partner. Ensure that you look your best, and make sure to follow the photographer’s direction.

4. After you have both had a long day at work, take that extra time to run a hot bath. Use some fragrant bath oil, and relax together in the bubbles with wine, strawberries and chocolates.

5. Compose a poem and mail it to your partner’s place of work inside a blank envelope. You can choose to write in a sexy modern style, or sentimental Shakespearean. Try to write according to your lover’s personality. You could also compose an erotic poem starting with “What I love best about your body…”

6. Find ways to make your partner laugh. Send each other sexy jokes through text and emails. However, be sure to stay away from those mushy chain letters.

7. Everyone loves a compliment. Men and women both need to feel loved and appreciated in their relationship. A nice compliment can really make someone’s day.

8. If you lover is sick, take the day off work to play either doctor or nurse. Rent a few movies, boil some chicken soup and spend the day enjoying each other’s company.

9. Sending thank-you notes can add just a touch of romance to your relationship. Make sure the notes are specific about why you’re grateful for your lover, and how your lover makes a difference in your life. Finish your note off with the promise of a surprise waiting at home….

10. If it so happens that you are at a private spot near a beach or lake, you could take time to partake in a spontaneous skinny dip - weather permitting of course!

11. Play a game of strip poker with your lover. Set a romantic atmosphere with soft lighting, wine and some music.

12. Plan a mystery weekend away from home. Give your partner some hints on what to pack, or if you feel adventurous persuade them to let you do all the packing.

The more you and your lover do for each other, the more content you will both be inside, and outside the bedroom. Romance is not all about money. It is about how creative both you and your partner are in adding a touch of romance to your relationship.

 

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Sexy Games

Sunday, May 17th, 2009 by Dr Mia

Sex games can liven up your sexual experience, turning it literally into sex play! Sometimes the daily grind can wind us down, so that by the time we hit the sack we’re tired and uninspired. So why not spice things up with some kinky sex games?

If your bedtime frolics have become rather stale, then you need a steamy remedy to reignite the lost spark. Playing sexy games can help renew your desire between the sheets!

These sex games add variety to your sexual experience and open new doors of exploration, allowing you and your partner to travel down sensual roads you never knew existed. If at any time you feel the urge to divert from the rules of any sex games to follow a newly opened path of potential pleasure, go ahead. See where the game leads you (as long as it’s a route you both want to go). The point of sex games is that before long, the two of you will wind up writhing between the sheets.

Here are some fun and kinky sex games for couples that will inject playful new energy into your sex life:

Play Truth or Dare, with a sexual slant. For Truth questions, ask sensual, provocative questions, such as, “Where on your body do you like being kissed the most?” or “What sexual fantasy would you most like to fulfill?” Asking these questions in a sexually-charged and playful atmosphere encourages a sense of safety and openness between the two of you about these subjects, in which you can discuss your secret sexual wishes without fear of being mocked or rejected. When your partner chooses Dare, dare them to perform a sexual act that you know you will both get aroused from: you can start small by asking him to do a strip tease, then gradually increase the heat by asking him to lick a certain delectable part of your body.

Play strip poker, or strip hangman, or strip checkers - or strip anything!  You can turn any board game, card game or word game into a stripping game. Basically, whenever someone loses a hand (poker), guesses a wrong letter (hangman), or loses a chip (checkers), they have to remove an article of clothing. You can up the ante by requiring that the removal of clothing has to be done in a sexually teasing and provocative way. You can also have a rule that is someone wins a round, they can request the sexual favor of their choice. You can prepare for this game by wearing sexy undergarments, which will be sure to entice!

Role play. Choose a fantasy scenario in which you can each dress up in different roles, such as a schoolgirl, a nurse, a milkmaid, a fireman, a military officer, a doctor. Try to stay in character the entire time. You can also re-enact the most tempting scenes from your favorite porn films.

Get tasty. Buy edible body paints that you can rub on one another. This allows you to get creative with your designs and have a lot of fun! And since they are edible, when you are done admiring your art, you have the pleasure of licking it off one another. You can also use various foods for this, such as chocolate syrup, whipped cream, honey, etc. Be aware that this will get sticky and messy, so protect your sheets!

If you’re new to playing sex games and you need a bit more structure and guidance, there are also plenty of sex board games for couples that you can buy.

Sex games are intended to be fun and playful, so they are most successful when they are undertaken in an open, caring atmosphere. While the main aim of sex games is to inject pleasure and enjoyment into lovemaking, they are not the antidote for any underlying relationship problems.  If there are real issues keeping you and your partner from enjoying a healthy sex life, then it’s best to talk things over openly with each other or together with a sex therapist. Only engage in sex games if you both feel you can offer each other a safe haven of love and trust!

Sex games foster a fresh sense of togetherness between you and your partner, reinforcing the special connection that brought you together in the first place. They increase the anticipation and whet your appetite. Most of all, they make it fun to be together! In the end, the most solid relationships are built on a strong sense of togetherness. Sex games can help strengthen that bond.

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